Gradius Rebirth - fucking hard

Few shoot-em-ups did as much to define the genre as Konami's Gradius. Taking the side scrolling gameplay of Scramble and Defender, Gradius established most of genre trappings we now regard as cliches: a progressive weapon upgrade system, themed levels and gigantic bosses.

The mighty R-Type may have come along and stolen the series' thunder a couple of years later, but there's something incredibly solid and pure about Gradius and its sequels that sets them apart from their peers; the core gameplay has barely changed over the course of the five Gradius games, but the quality of their design and the tough challenge each one presents makes them timeless classics.

With Gradius Rebirth, available to download now from WiiWare, Konami has done a Mega Man 9 and taken the series back to its late eighties/early nineties roots; the flashy presentation of Treasure's Gradius V has been pared back to a decidedly 16-bit style, with sprite-based ships, pixelated scaling and even a touch of slowdown in places - very SNES.

The retro nostalgia extends to the level designs, which are directly inspired by the first three games - Konami's shooters have always been quaintly self referential, but Rebirth takes the biscuit: there's barely an alien or stage design that hasn't been seen before at some point over the last twenty four years.

But then again, perhaps this is the point - the first level at first appears to be a straight recreation of the original Gradius, complete with the mysterious gap in the mountain to fly through for bonus points. It's only at the level's end, where the expected popcorn-like flurry of volcanic rock is replaced by a more malevolent wave of aliens, that the game begins to offer any surprises - it's a clever love letter to longterm series fans, lulling them into a sense of familiarity before stealthily closing the trap.

It should also be pointed out that Rebirth is phenomenally hard. I've played every single Gradius game - most of Konami's shooting back catalogue, for that matter - and never have I encountered such a challenge as this. If you thought Gradius V was difficult, think again - Rebirth throws everything it has at you almost from the outset, with level two ending with an endless pursuit of pink bubblegum through moving columns, culminating in a gigantic boss. Lose a life, and you'll have to repeat the entire ordeal again.

This stultifying difficulty level will no doubt gratify the genuine Gradius veterans out there; for the mere mortals such as myself, Rebirth is a stretch too far.